Worthwhile watchfulness: Working with aging donors

Many nonprofit organizations are fortunate to be surrounded by long-time supporters whose generosity has sustained the mission for years, and sometimes decades. These donors often remain deeply committed to the causes they care about well into their later years. As the donor population ages, however, nonprofit professionals increasingly find themselves navigating situations that require both sensitivity and caution.

Most interactions with older donors are straightforward and positive. But occasionally, a donor's behavior, requests, or circumstances may raise concerns about cognitive decline, undue influence, financial exploitation, or simply a misunderstanding about charitable intentions. Of course, you and other nonprofit staff are not expected to diagnose medical conditions or serve as financial advisors. Still, because fundraisers often develop trusted, long-term relationships with donors, you may be among the first people to notice that something seems different.

Here are five signs that may warrant a thoughtful pause and a closer look.

1. The donor seems unusually confused about previous gifts or commitments

A donor who suddenly cannot remember making recent gifts, repeatedly asks the same questions, or appears confused about longstanding charitable arrangements may be experiencing challenges that deserve attention.

Of course, everyone occasionally forgets details. The key is whether the behavior represents a noticeable change from the donor's normal pattern. If so, it may be wise to slow the conversation, provide written summaries for the donor and for your files, and encourage the donor to review decisions with a donor’s trusted family members or legal advisors when appropriate.

2. Grant recommendations or gift requests are dramatically different from past behavior

People's interests evolve, and donors certainly have the right to support new causes. However, a sudden and dramatic shift in giving priorities can sometimes be a signal that additional questions are warranted.

For example, a donor who has supported local education initiatives for decades may unexpectedly request a large gift to an unfamiliar national disease research organization they recently encountered through a phone solicitation, email, or direct-mail campaign. While the gift may be entirely legitimate, nonprofit professionals should feel comfortable asking open-ended questions to ensure the donor understands the mission of the organization they wish to support and how the gift aligns with their goals. 

3. A new individual is speaking for the donor or directing decisions

Family members, caregivers, and advisors often play appropriate and important roles in supporting older adults. At the same time, nonprofit staff should pay attention when a previously independent donor is suddenly accompanied by someone who insists on controlling conversations, answering questions on the donor's behalf, or directing charitable decisions.

The presence of a helper is not itself a concern. What matters is whether the donor appears comfortable, informed, and genuinely engaged in the decision-making process. When possible, organizations should make reasonable efforts to hear directly from the donor and confirm that charitable decisions reflect the donor's wishes, and then prepare appropriate documentation.

4. The donor mentions suspicious financial activity or unusual solicitations

Older adults are frequently targeted by scams, fraudulent charities, deceptive sweepstakes, and aggressive fundraising tactics. During conversations, donors may mention receiving constant requests for money, confusing invoices, urgent appeals, or pressure from unfamiliar organizations.

These comments often provide an opportunity for education and support. Certainly nonprofit staff should avoid giving legal or financial advice, but if you are faced with this situation, you can encourage donors to discuss concerns with trusted family members, attorneys, accountants, financial advisors, or representatives of the Community Foundation. Helping donors access reliable resources can be an important form of stewardship.

5. Important documentation has not been reviewed in many years

Beneficiary designations, estate plans, powers of attorney, and charitable provisions often remain untouched for years, even as circumstances change. Aging donors may assume that documents signed long ago still accurately reflect their wishes.

A gentle reminder to review charitable plans periodically can help donors ensure that their intentions remain current and clearly documented. This is particularly important when donor-advised funds, endowment gifts, planned gifts, or other long-term charitable arrangements are involved.

So what can you do?

The best course of action is to prepare yourself well before any red flags appear. Encouraging donors to introduce you to their advisors and other family members early in the relationship gives you plenty of time to build natural connections with the people they trust. Those relationships can be invaluable if concerns later arise. 

Of course, you will approach any situation with an aging donor with empathy and respect. Most older donors remain fully capable of making thoughtful charitable decisions and should be treated accordingly. At the same time, organizations understandably feel obligated to exercise good judgment when circumstances raise questions. If you are already encountering red flag situations and you don’t have a connection with trusted people in a donor’s life, consult your colleagues and potentially even your organization’s legal advisors.

The bottom line is that this is a very tricky area where donor stewardship, situational awareness, and confidentiality considerations overlap. Being prepared ahead of time is well worth your attention.